I will save you all the long story of how a Facebook post on a controversial topic brought me back to a friend the girls and I haven’t seen in almost a year and a half (mommy life gets busy). What I will tell you is what happened AFTER said conversation that resulted in a VERY LONG morning, and a GREAT play date.
I am NOT by any means the most logical person in the world, so when a friend I hadn’t spoken with in a while and I decided to let our kids play so we could enjoy some adult conversation I was STOKED to say the least, and didn’t think about the EXACT condition of my house. Now, let me explain this just a bit further by saying I was raised for the first 8-9 years of my life in a house where my father was a hoarder. I am starting to learn that children of hoarders don’t necessarily hoard themselves, and yet in some ways, they DO. When you are raised by someone who sees value in every coffee can, weird shaped jar, or stack of magazines you are either a DIYer/crafters child, or a hoarders child. As a crafter or DIYer I’m sure you’d have a spot for your projects, AND even if it was a messy or cluttered spot, it is still one area. When you are a hoarder, you may have GREAT intentions for the 1,000 magazines you have kept over the last 25 years, but they are all over, and nothing ever gets done with them. As a child, living in a hoarding home for so long, I became rather oblivious to that which
normal people those who do not hoard normally consider “junk” or “trash” and throw away. It’s not that I had a PLAN for the 15 12 pack boxes that sat stacked in my hallway, I just kept thinking I’ll get to those later, and would generally only think about it when I nearly knocked them over, on my way to bed, and would think “I’ll get them in the morning” and morning came and I’d walk right past them as though they were a work of art and supposed to be there.
Being the mom of a 3 and almost 2 year old, by the time my littles go to bed, I’m ready to relax and be DONE with “work” for the day. So naturally the night we made the plans for a play date the NEXT day, I was exhausted and figured I’ll get up an hour earlier, and I’ll clean all morning and it will be worth it when I get to see my girls having a good time playing. I got up and started on those 12-pack boxes, some diaper boxes and the grocery bags that had piled up in my hallway. I felt much better once the mess had been cleared, BUT there are MORE reasons than just my house being Pre-hoarder material. We have a dog, our dog sheds… EVERYWHERE. As in every room in the house is covered in dog hair that unless I sweep ever time he MOVES (I’m talking switches positions, blinks his eyes, breathes… you get my picture, right???) there is just hair EVERYWHERE!!! Some people are okay with this, others, would seriously give the dog away, I get that which is another reason I say our home is not “right” for play dates.
The last reason our home isn’t the perfect place for play dates is “But Dad” and his smoking habit. I know, I know, smoking is BAD for you, but let’s just say it would be BAD for all of us if he decided to quit without getting help. He doesn’t smoke a TON (My ex-husband smoked like 3 packs a DAY, talk about an expensive habit), but he DOES smoke, and he tends to smoke in the house now that we OWN it and we make the rules (I know, I know, some of you are cringing, but it is what it is.) I completely forgot, being that I have lived with smokers since I was about 9, that some people just don’t like smoke or can’t be around it. Fortunately for me “But Dad” is very polite and thinks about other people in ways I just don’t think about, and he reminded me that the smoking might make for a shortened play date, and so….
We ended up meeting at McDonald’s where I was able to relax and let the girls play without worrying I was missing some bit of hoarders paradise, missed a BIG bunch of puppy fur, or that the smoke was going to be a put off to an otherwise AMAZING play date. The kids played, my friend and I chatted, and we WILL be doing this again!!! I am sooo happy we changed the location, and I really don’t think I will set another play date up at the house until the girls are old enough to help clean and we are living in a bigger place (Hopefully with a “Man Cave” for Mr “But Dad” to smoke in.
Anyone have any tips on clutter??? Throw them MY way 🙂
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