I’m spoiled. I admit it. My grandparents and parents spoiled me as a child. My mom still spoils me. I have an amazing life where I feel spoiled quite often, however as an adult, I find that my definition of “Spoiled” has changed. I use to feel as though spoiled meant someone who gets everything they want- that was it, end of story. I must confess however, it wasn’t until I became an adult (actually, the other day to be exact) that I truly realized that being spoiled is MORE than that.
I’m the one who plans things, yet things NEVER go according to plan. This. Drives. Me. Nuts. I’m sorry, I get in a bad mood, I get snippy, and I make life harder on everyone else when plans fall through or don’t go as I want them to. I AM SPOILED. When things don’t go my way, I want to take my ball & bat and go home.
I really didn’t realize this until the other day when I was talking with someone and the subject of our Halloween Fiasco came up. Last year, Halloween was magical. We spent the whole day watching Halloween movies and carving pumpkins, and then after dinner, we watched The Great Pumpkin while eating popcorn. Alas, this year was not so. It started with me over-sleeping and waking up to Kira’s Speech Therapist here and the kids were just waking up too. From that moment on it was one thing after another that went wrong. I figured Kira would enjoy the “messy play” of scooping out the pumpkin guts, she wanted to fling them everywhere. Big messes ended with kids in tear, daddy frustrated and mommy near tears.
While having this conversation, I was asked, “Do you think Kira had fun?” I honestly guess I was thinking she didn’t because I was upset, but honestly, while she was playing in pumpkin guts, she DID have fun. So what that it only lasted 15 minutes and we only got 1 pumpkin done all together and Nick and I finished the others. She have fun associated with the holiday, it was a success. Lightbulb, aha, whatever you wanna call it, I’m spoiled because I expect everyone to live up to my expectations. I set pretty high expectations most of the time too. I would be much better off setting much lower expectations to help all of us out.
Thinking about all this makes me think about a sign that hangs in our apartment. “Life is all about how you handle Plan B” It’s my motto, however, sometimes I forget it. Sometimes I don’t think about how plans are flexible until I’m already in that really bad mood and ready to scream at the world. So, I am pledging from now on to try to relax my strict expectations, and just take it as it comes. I’m not perfect, I know I’ll trip on my high expectations from time to time, but, at least now I am aware of things that I need to work on in this area.
Do you enjoy planning and/or hold high expectations on yourself and family??? What strategies have helped you lower your expectations and live life fuller???